Last night was good night. Had dinner with two great college friends… Barry in from New York and Russ, my local boy. Hit The Misfit for the first time. A loud, hipster scene… but really good food and cocktails and a fun gastropub/French bistro vibe… Check out my review on Yelp.
Then I took a nice drive home on the PCH, where I rolled down the windows, inhaled the cool breeze and clean, crisp, almost floral smelling, ocean air and blasted the stereo. Heaven… soothing, peaceful, rejuvenating heaven.
It also hit me… a lesson I needed to be reminded of… and one a few of my friends need to hear. Not mentioning names… You know who you are. But take this to heart.
It’s okay to be by yourself… Just fill the time and the days with beauty and harmony. Embrace what and who and where you are. Let what is happening wash over you, inform you, but not define you. It is an experience you are having and nothing more. Learn from it, grow from it.
We are misguided in thinking that being alone always equates to being lonely… that being quiet always means silence. That is so far from the truth. Being comfortable in your own skin… Loving yourself before you can love anyone else… These are the true meanings of being alone…
Love who you are as a person and an individual. Sit with yourself without judgement or questions. Just be… Just exist… Just be content in your own body and mind. Shhh… We are all flawed. There is no such thing as “perfection.”
I used to believe that perfection was attainable. It is not. And the more we try to attain it, sometimes the more damage we do. I know if I break something and I try to fix it and attempt to put it back “perfectly” together, that too often something else cracks or breaks… and it sends it down a path that would have been much better if I had just left it alone… and accepted and embraced the imperfections.
Accept life’s imperfections… our own imperfections… love yourself. Be happy with who you are, as long as you are a good person and make efforts to be a good person… Kindness, generosity and love are our greatest and most important legacies.
Don’t be afraid to be alone… because it can be fulfilling and magical and productive, and does not have to become loneliness.
Don’t be afraid to be quiet… to let your voice be still and not have your mind screaming and wandering and restlessly moving about.
I was driving home alone last night, but I was far from lonely. I was content and quite happy. I was quiet, but the music was playing, so while there was literal sound, my brain was at peace. This is a great place to be… a great place to live… This space… and the time we spend with ourselves is potent. It will re-energize us… re-engage us… and save us.
I hit repeat a few times… A stunning song… a song that always moves me and fills me with a grace and beauty. Amazing how a song can quiet us… This one does it for me.
A simply fantastic song.
According to Wikipedia: It “was released as a download-only single on 13 October 2008. The song was inspired by Syd Barrett, one of the founding members of Pink Floyd. The single was released in connection with The City Wakes, a festival in tribute to Syd Barrett that took place in Cambridge and London in October 2008.”
To quote my Cantor, Doug Cotler…
There’s nothing to say
Stop all the chatter
That gets in the way
And listen… Listen…”
I beg you all… I beg myself… to listen… listen to the music, listen to your soul.