This Damned _+)(*&^%$%^&*()*&^%$ Skunk… The End… Well… I May Need A Recap (Part 5)

The Grande Finale… or perhaps The Grand Illusion… I could go for some Styx.  My friend John wants me to play Lynyrd Skynyrd’s “That Smell.”  Okay, I’ll do it…

So this is it… you are probably terribly bored at this point… I have overstepped your reading desires… and there is still no end in sight…

Am I finding the humor in this?  Are you finding humor in this?  Is it at all funny?  Not the suffering and the stench, I mean… That is horrible… depressing… it seems like this stink will be here forever… Sell the house?  Run away?

I’m asking about the writing and journaling… I don’t even know any more… But it is my way of keeping sane and having an outlet…

The smell is better, but not gone… Smelled it again on the pooch this morning…

The front of the house smells okay… but I guess that’s because it gets much better ventilation… But so very odd… As soon as you step from the kitchen to the hallway… literally on the line between flooring and carpet… BOOM.  It is like another world… a world of skunkiness… Ugh.

ServPro is looking like the best option… Nothing else has done the trick… not completely.  Break out the check book… But of course, they can’t clean the dog…

Day 5 (Thursday)
Woke up this morning with another BLINDING headache… Sinuses in pain… overwhelmed… Decide it’s time to unplug all the air “fresheners”.  I think they are part of what is making me sick…

I wish I had a video of what I did next… Brilliant physical comedy move… Would have gotten many hits on the web… you know, the goal of all teenagers…

I go to open my bedroom door… still in a haze… I pull the door… right onto my big toe!  Gash it, good… Yes, the door jam is now a toe jam.  Either way since the door is stuck, it is not open… I follow, with perfect timing, and walk right into the door… Square on… Full body smash… forehead… face… chest…

It was a perfectly executed thing of beauty… and pain… but Chaplin and Keaton would be proud… Well… One is not supposed to get wounded.  Comedy is not pretty, but it is not supposed to hurt quite so much.

Realize the stink truly is stuck in the AC vents… My contractor says not to clan them because our ducts are too bad… need to be replaced.  I close the vents and crank the heat… maybe the heat will kill the odor… My own idea… So far, no change… nothing… nada…

Off to a place to get some putty… You put it by the AC filter… smells like orange… He implied it was nasty… Nastier than stale skunk oil?  Possible?  Who knows.  Gotta try.  It’s in there… It’s called Clean Air… More bread out… and not the baked, multi-grain kind… Seems like each thing is at least $15 a pop.

No fast food on the way… Foot down… Had a spinach and kale smoothie for breakfast… Even made a Toad In The Hole… Will have a nice dinner.  Hell, I deserve it… and I need to get back on track.

I am done writing about this damn skunk… I mean he is still out there… Neighbors encountered it last night… Neighborhood terror… Maybe we can all chip in to trap it… Guy will then set it free… Humane, but pricey…

So that is it… No more to say.  You have heard it all, I think… And I need to move on to greener pastures… outdoorsy, nature, beautiful smelling flowers and such…

Why create such a vile, nasty critter?  What is the lesson to be learned… Yes, right… don’t ever let the sweet pooch outside by herself ever again.  That is the lesson.  And oh yeah… if your dog is ever skunked… do not bring her in to bathe her… and MOVE.

And now please enjoy pictures of my beloved pooch, Bozie… starring as Moses.  Part, Bozie, Part!!!

The Headshot…

Clean Bozie

The Movie Role… Bozie tells the evil Skunk Pharaoh to let her people go.  Pharaoh chases Bozie with an Asp… and a powerful fog of Stink Juice… Bozie grabs her people and runs off into the Desert… But in front of her is the Red Sea… Pharaoh’s Skunk Soldiers are close behind… Bozie tells her people to go into the Red Sea, that she and the Lord of Tomato will save them… “Part”, she says… “Part!!!”

Bozie Bloody Mary Bozie Tomato Bod Bozie Tomato Head Bozie Red Sea

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